Motivational speaker Jim Rohn famously said that we are the average of the five people we spend the most time with. While it may sound like an exaggerated quote and lacks scientific validity, it helps to convey a very powerful idea that the people we surround ourselves with greatly influence our thoughts, behaviours, and ultimately shape who we become. Look at your closest friends and family who have made substantial contributions in shaping you. In some cases, you accomplished much more than you thought you were capable of because of their timely intervention. With a genuine desire that you shouldn’t fail in life, your closest friends and family didn’t allow you to follow your dream and they coerced you to follow easier goals. They do it out of love and concern for you and your dreams, aspirations and ambitions would never be accomplished because you were not allowed to pursue it for fear of failure.

As you begin this wonderful academic year, you may want to do some introspection and identify those people who have influence on you. Do they uplift and inspire you or do they bring you down? Have they limited you in some way? Or have they kept you in your comfort zone? When you look back you will know how strong was their influence on you and how your life has been shaped by their influence. Maybe it is a good time to make a resolution to associate more with people who will uplift and help you reach your fullest potential and make you the best version of you. And when you give more time to such people in your life, you’ll find that the negative people will have no more influence on you. Your decisions to say ‘No’ to gossiping, bunking classes, getting into infatuations, fights, quarrels, drugs and overuse of social media will distance you from such negative people. If you associate yourself with such friends, it’s likely that you will inherit such habits.

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No. Two simple letters. One simple word. Yet very powerful when used at the right time. It can make or break someone’s life. It could mean success or failure. Some people dare to say no, but most don’t have the courage to say no. Why is it sometimes so difficult to say no? For many people, saying no is packed with guilt. Maybe you’re afraid of disappointing someone. Maybe you find it difficult to say no to someone you love, care or respect. But no matter the reasons, learning how to say no is an important skill for your personal and professional well-being.

Our time and energy are precious resources that we should use wisely. And that means we can’t do everything and be everywhere at the same time. Most of us like to hang out with people who have the same likes and dislikes. Yet, we end up doing something we dislike for the sake of making someone happy. We compromise on our likes and do something we dislike.

Saying no when required requires courage and self-esteem. You’ve got to be assertive when you mean no. Can you say “I’m sorry, I’m not able to come with you tomorrow; I have a lot to study and just don’t think I’m going to have time” to your best friend? Well, it takes courage to say this. You may think you sound rude, but you are just being courteous and assertive. Learn to turn someone down politely. You should know when to say no; if not, you will be a scapegoat always.

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The Indian Navy celebrates 4th December as Navy Day, to commemorate its achievements and its role in Operation Trident against Pakistan during the Indo-Pak War of 1971. The Indian Navy is a well balanced three-dimensional force, capable of operating above, on and under the surface of the oceans, and safe guards our national interests.

The theme for Navy Day 2022 is Swarnim Vijay Varsh, marking 50 years of India’s triumph in the 1971 Indo-Pak War. Navy Day celebrations stretch for over a week, which is called Navy Week, and comprises of functions/activities to raise awareness among the general public about the role of the Indian Navy. On most naval bases, the warships and aircrafts of the Indian Navy are accessible to visitors during Navy Week open house.

The Indian Navy plays a significant role in securing the marine borders of the nation as well as accelerating the international relations of India through various means like seaport visits, joint ventures, patriotic missions, calamity relief, and many others. The modern-day Indian Navy has been transformed in order to improve its position in the Indian Ocean and beyond. The invocation to Lord Varuna (The Sea God) in the Vedas was adopted by the Indian Navy for its emblem, with the motto “Sam no Varunah” meaning “Be auspicious unto us, Oh Varuna”.

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‘Join the navy, see the world!’ I was very fascinated by this ad with images of an Indian naval ship and a sailor in a white uniform in the local newspapers in the year 1986. Those days, there was no internet and we would get to know about recruitment in the armed forces through recruitment rallies or ads. The selection process was robust; only the physically, mentally, medically and academically fit could get through.

Joining the Indian Navy was a dream come true for me. At first, my parents were against the idea as they knew that joining the armed forces was a risky affair and soldiers get killed during encounters and wars. Somehow I managed to convince them and I went for the recruitment rally and got selected.

Youngsters join the armed forces for different reasons; attracted by the uniform, promising career, the pay and perks, opportunities of travelling, the social prestige, to support their family, etc. But from the day we wear that prestigious uniform we all have just one reason; Service before Self. We forget all our differences of religion, caste, creed, language, state and we proudly call ourselves the Indian Armed Forces (IAF). We learn to embrace the differences and live in harmony to serve our nation.

Of course, it requires a lot of sacrifice on our part as we join the armed forces at a very young age; service becomes our priority and everything else becomes secondary. While those of our age enjoy college life, we are getting grilled during our training. Of course, the rigorous training made us disciplined, courageous, confident, gritty and agile.

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During my recent visit to a school in Agra, I had the opportunity to speak to thousands of students and numerous teachers. Both teachers and students shared some of their post-Covid concerns with me. Teachers find it very challenging to manage the students as they are frequently distracted and seem to be preoccupied with many other issues. At the other end, students find it very hard to sit in class listening to the teachers for long hours. Many of these high school students claimed that they had lost interest in studies. Two years of online classes and Covid lockdowns have resulted in many such social issues. However, most students showed an honest desire to get back on track with their studies.

The key to becoming an effective and successful student is learning how to study smarter, not just harder. Top students achieve their success by developing and applying certain strategies and study habits. So if you want to become a successful student, don’t get discouraged, don’t give up, just embrace some of the study habits, and you’ll see your grades go up. Here are the top 7 study habits of successful students.

1. Have definite and written study goals.

Successful students are driven by purpose. They have a definite and written study goals which help them stay focused and monitor their progress every day. They are very clear about what they want to accomplish throughout the year. A journey without destination is meaningless and gets you nowhere. Most of us plan and prepare many days for a short holiday trip. But we don’t bother to have study plans even for the current academic year. We just go through the motion of education without any purpose. Begin the academic year with specific study goals which will help you accomplish your dreams. Your purpose should be greater than the obstacles. I strongly recommend that you should have a written study goal in the beginning of the academic year and make a commitment to achieve it.

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I was recently invited to a college in Kasargode district, Kerala, to conduct a public speaking workshop. During the session I invited the students to come forward and deliver a two-minute impromptu speech on a topic of their choice. Of course, public speaking is a scary thing for most people and these students weren’t any different. After much persuasion and coaxing, only a handful of students showed the courage to grab this opportunity; the majority were more comfortable sitting in their chairs (comfort zone) and observing the brave ones. If they stepped out, there was a possibility of being laughed at, ridiculed or made fun of by the audience. Or they might have forgotten what they wanted to say due to nervousness or what would others have thought if they didn’t perform well? What surprised me most was a female student who came to the stage reluctantly and told me: “Sir, I will not remove my mask because it has become part of me and I feel more comfortable with my mask on.” The stage was a couple of metres away from the audience and there was enough social distance. She stuttered and stammered throughout her two minutes on stage. Later on, I found out that it was not due to the fear of Covid-19, but it was because of her fear of facing the audience that she refused to remove the mask. She said: “With the mask, others won’t know my nervousness and fear, and I feel more comfortable with it.”

As the fear of Covid-19 eased, I began conducting sessions for small groups. After having spent almost two years with online classes, most students have become comfortable with them as they have the freedom to keep their cameras off. Even if they are asked to turn on the video, the usual response is “poor network”! The teachers have no choice but to assume that the students are listening to them. After schools reopened, most students are back in school with masks which is mandatory. But now there is a tendency for many students to hide behind those masks as they are not easily recognized by others, especially when they are in a new school and environment.

Have you gotten too comfortable with your mask? Are you trying to hide behind it?

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“The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why.” — Mark Twain

Life seems to be getting back on track for most of us after a long period of hibernation due to Covid-19. Though the invisible virus brought the human race to its knees and shattered many of our dreams, we have learned to rise like a phoenix from the ashes to emerge stronger, smarter and powerful. But the pandemic has taught us not to be complacent and take life for granted. It’s an awakening call for all of us. I sincerely urge all of you to get back on track with your dreams, goals and aspirations. Let’s not wait for the perfect time. It’s now or never.

As students, you may just want to do well in your studies and get a full A+. The question is, what’s next? Many students go with the flow and don’t have any particular direction. They are ready to go where life takes them. It’s time to remind you that we should have a something big to strive for, and our everyday actions should be directed towards accomplishing it.

Yes, I am talking about creating a vision for your life. Where there is no vision, there is no hope. A visionary person has dreams, aspirations, goals and all his actions are aligned with his life purpose. Vision gives direction and a glimpse over our life to make our goals and purpose become a reality. In order to understand where we want ourselves to be in life, we must have a clear vision over our life. Once you understand that vision, life will become more meaningful and fulfilling.

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Words can make or break a person’s life, can start wars or bring peace. Words can indeed be mightier than a sword! Words have the energy, the power and the ability to help, to heal, to hurt, to harm or humiliate. Knowing the strength of the words we utter, we must discipline ourselves to speak in a way that conveys respect, gentleness and humility.

It was Albert Mehrabian, Professor Emeritus of Psychology at the University of California, who introduced the 7-38-55 rule. According to him, in any communication 7 per cent of the meaning is communicated through spoken word, 38 per cent through the tone of voice, and 55 per cent through body language. He says the non-verbal elements in communication are more important, and it really reveals the person. Though words matter only 7 per cent, in real life we know how important words are. Many of us might have been hurt by someone or we might have hurt someone with our wrong choice of words. For many, your words have been a life-changing experience and for some it has been a devastating experience.

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We often hear students complain that they have a slower brain, a less creative brain or one that cannot absorb anything. ‘If I were smarter, I would do a lot better in school’ is a common excuse we often hear. Many students ask me if I believe some children are more intelligent than others. My answer is a definite yes. More intelligent students learn faster and produce better results whereas less intelligent students under perform. But, I always continue saying that ‘Your intelligence is your responsibility’. I mean if you are not intelligent, it is your fault.

I believe that a person’s intelligence can be trained and anyone can become more intelligent. If you decide today that you want to increase your brain power, your intelligence, your memory and your ability to think, you can! I agree that there are some children who are born gifted, but most gifted people or geniuses are self-trained.

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Schooling is an important phase in our lives and everyone goes through this structured path at least for a decade. However, I feel that the education that takes place outside the controlled environment of a classroom play a more vital role in our life.

I find that learning from ‘real life’ can give us more insight into how we can become better self-directed learners and prepare ourselves for a future that we can’t predict.

I used to be a back-bencher in high school and couldn’t write even a paragraph in my mother tongue without mistakes. I still can recall the humiliation I experienced from my Malayalam teacher in front of other students. He even told my parents I had a learning disability! A significant portion of my adolescence was wasted by a school system that tries to fit a “square peg in a round hole”.

Shockingly only a few of the things I learned in the classroom actually align with the most valuable and important lessons I’ve learned from my lived experiences. There might be very little correlation between the marks you obtain in school and what you would do in the future. I’ve noticed a huge gap between formal education and the real life. I want to share with you some of the things schools don’t teach you that you should learn to succeed in life.

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