The difference between a popular and successful individual and an unpopular and unsuccessful person is the quality of empathy. Empathy refers to the ability to put yourself in the shoes of the other person. It is a sincere effort to understand exactly how it feels to be in the position of the other. It involves understanding the background, challenges, thoughts and emotions of the other persons to the maximum possible extent and letting them know that you are aware of their point of view. Putting aside one’s own viewpoints and being respectful and caring about the needs and feelings of others is at the very root of empathy.

Empathy is rated as one of the topmost skills essential for personal and professional success. In the place of study or work, empathy enables us to understand and therefore work better with classmates, colleagues or team members, leading to overall satisfaction and progress. It also enables us to become better leaders who can improve the functioning of organisations.

Developing empathy skills

Empathy may be classified into three categories: cognitive (logically comprehending the other’s situations and thoughts), emotional (accurately experiencing the other’s feelings and emotions) or compassionate (taking practical action to better the lot of the other). Compassionate empathy is the highest form of empathy. Here’s an example: Khwaja Moinuddin, Bhagat Reddy and Srinath Reddy, three friends from Hyderabad, quit their lucrative corporate jobs to start Nawab’s Kitchen, where they cook the choicest delicacies and feed over 200 orphans free of cost every day.

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One of the most essential life skills, both in personal lives and in the workplace, is the ability to solve problems effectively. In today’s world full of stress, tension and competition, the one who can look at every difficult situation as a problem that can be solved, emerges as a winner. People who are able to analyse the problems they see around themselves with a calm and open mind and come up with practical solutions to solve these problems, are the ones who go really far in life. Take any field, and you will see that the ones who have really made a difference are the ones who have faced and solved problems in a creative manner, whether it is Dr A. P. J. Abdul Kalam in nuclear science or Mother Teresa in social service, M. S. Dhoni in cricket or Steve Jobs in technology.

The Concise Oxford Dictionary defines a problem as, “a doubtful or difficult matter requiring a solution” or “something hard to understand or accomplish or deal with”. Problems always arise when we work to reach an objective or a goal. Problem solving therefore refers to the actions taken to overcome the obstacles in the path of reaching the goal.

The art of problem-solving

Before starting to solve a problem, it is essential to first study the problem thoroughly. Albert Einstein says, “If I had an hour to solve a problem, I would spend 55 minutes thinking about the problem and 5 minutes thinking about solutions.” Here are some useful questions to ask before starting the process of solving a problem: Is the problem real or just in someone’s mind? Is this problem actually an opportunity to do something better? Does the problem really need solving or will it get resolved with time? Have we failed to see the ‘bigger problem’? What is the root cause of the problem?

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Mumbai, India’s financial capital, is also home to the world’s largest slums. Here, the world’s richest and poorest live alongside each other! Experts feared that Mumbai’s slums would explode with the Covid-19 pandemic. However, on the contrary, during both the first and second wave of the pandemic, Mumbai’s slums exploded with compassion, resilience, and a strong community spirit.

In March 2020, Covid-19, combined with the sudden and complete lockdown, struck a deadly blow to the residents of these slums — lower middle class and unorganized workers, migrant daily wage labourers, and small entrepreneurs. As the people here are used to facing crises, information about pandemic control spread like wildfire and people co-operated with the efforts of medical and security workers.

There was an equally deadly enemy: poverty! With all establishments closed down and no means of travel outside the city, the working class, especially the daily wage earners and migrant labourers faced an unprecedented crisis, leading to starvation and daily deaths.

It was then that the undying spirit of community-based organizations all over Mumbai, swung into action. It was not only NGOs from outside, but also NGOs born and nurtured in the slums that decided that no one should go hungry. Even as you read this article, they are waging their battles against poverty and hunger during the second wave of the pandemic too. Three such organizations are: the Bhartiya Muslim Mahila Andolan (BMMA), Hum Sab Ek Hain Foundation and the Mohalla Committee Movement Trust (MCMT).

Bharatiya Muslim Mahila Andolan

The Bhartiya Muslim Mahila Andolan (BMMA) office, a small two-storey structure sits in the heart of the slums of Kherwadi and Bandra East. Founded in 2007 by academicians turned social activists Noorjehan Safia Niaz and Zakia Soman, this women’s organization has been leading struggles for Muslim women’s personal and professional rights, domestic and political freedom, for equal access to education, employment and healthcare. The ban on triple talaq and the movement for opening places of worship to women are among some of their achievements.

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There are a lot of discussions these days about how human beings have exploited nature and caused the degeneration of the universe to such an extent that nature is now taking its revenge by wiping out this harmful species. Even as we fight with the pandemic, we are forced to fight with a greater evil — human greed and cruelty. The greed for wealth and power continues to manifest itself in the endless battles between the haves and the have-nots, between those who exploit the weak and downtrodden. The future belongs to those who have the wisdom to avoid corruption and adhere to the path of truth and freedom. The future belongs to the young who must put an end to the era of injustice and herald a new dawn. An excellent example of this eternal principle is Arun Joshi’s classic novel The City and The River (1990).

Arun Joshi has been acclaimed as a psychological and philosophical novelist who has made a unique contribution to Indian English fiction. He uses literature as a medium to explore and resolve the human existential crisis. He wrote five novels — The Foreigner (1968), The Strange Case of Billy Biswas (1971), The Apprentice (1974), The Last Labyrinth (1981) which won the prestigious Sahitya Akademi Award, The City and The River (1990) and a collection of short stories, The Survivor (1975).

The City and The River is a fable of the Indian nation-state. A mixture of fantasy and prophecy, it has been hailed as a parable of the times. The novel has to be read carefully and its richness needs to be absorbed gradually. The City is all cities. The River is the mother of cities. The novel focuses on the battle between the victimized citizens and the corrupt, power-hungry rulers.

The great City on the banks of the great River is ruled by a rich Grand Master. Hailing from a family of rulers, he has a charismatic and hypnotic persona. He lives in a white-domed palace atop the picturesque Seven Hills. Next in rank come the docile brick-people living in brick colonies. Lowest of all stand the despised mud-people living on the banks of the great River. The most rebellious of them are the boatmen who bow to the River alone and refuse to salute the Grand Master. These are the ‘nameless’ fiery and proud people who can die for their beliefs.

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One of the many things that we have learned about during the pandemic times is the virtual or online classroom. We know that classrooms are essentially made up of students and teachers and not of benches, desks and blackboards. We also know that classrooms are created out of the bonding between students and teachers even when they are not in physical contact.

Here are a few tips that can make our classroom experience as learners, teachers and future teachers happier and more satisfying.

Joy: A happy mindset is essential for effective learning. An unwilling or scared student/teacher will definitely have an adverse impact on the entire class. Despite all the information that the world of internet and technology can give us, there are certain things that can be understood and experienced only in a classroom, in the company of fellow learners and experienced teachers. Learning takes place best when you are in a relaxed frame of mind. So, all negative emotions need to be kept outside the classroom.

Desire: A thirst for knowledge and wisdom is essential to being an effective learner/teacher. This desire to learn and understand more will enable us to pay attention and to observe. Both teachers and learners need to keep in mind that every individual/experience in the world teaches us something.

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One of the most common and puzzling questions asked to youngsters is, “What do you want to become when you grow up?” Or “what is your aim in life, what are your goals in life?” Interestingly, often the one who asks and the one who is supposed to answer have no clue as to how important this question is.

I have come across many youngsters who do not have a clear idea of their aims in life or what they want to become in life. Some of them are interested in more than one field and some are still in the process of discovering their interests, talents and passions.

I find such youngsters remarkably interesting. This is perhaps the most confusing, and at the same time, one of the most precious phases of their lives. If they can discover their true calling without falling into the trap of pressures exerted by parents, teachers and friends, then they can look forward to a truly happy and satisfying life.

Goals are of different types. Short-term goals are those goals that you wish to achieve within a year. Medium-term goals have a timeframe of one to three years. And goals which are expected to be achieved within the next five years are called long-term goals.

You must keep in mind that your goals should involve things that you really like to do, things which you do well or things which you believe you can do well. If you have the right mix of passion and hard work, then nothing can stop you from achieving that goal. That is how a newspaper boy becomes a nuclear scientist and People’s President like A.P.J. Abdul Kalam. Or a shy boy with stage fear becomes a renowned orator and powerful leader like Winston Churchill. It is crucial that you make your goal the centre of your life. As Swami Vivekananda puts it, “Take up one idea. Make that one idea your life — think of it, dream of it, live on that idea. Let the brain, muscles, nerves and every part of your body, be full of that idea, and leave every other idea alone.”

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The title of this article is inspired by Gabriel Garcia Marquez’s classic romantic novel Love In The Time Of Cholera (1985). Marquez set his novel against the raging cholera epidemic in early 20th century Latin America. In fact, epidemics and pandemics have ravaged the world at regular intervals — from plague to smallpox, and influenza to yellow fever. Since the past few months, Covid-19 has become the new normal in our lives. A pandemic that has spared no corner of the globe, it has changed and affected our existence in many ways, big and small. For young people bursting with life and energy, the confinement to home, sometimes solitary, faced with an uncertain future, has not been a very pleasant experience. There have been cases of abuse, addiction, depression, trauma, suicide, etc.

Then, how do we survive in these tough times? How do we ensure a good quality life along with safety? I’m sure you must have got a lot of suggestions. Let me dwell on just one concrete suggestion — reading for specific reasons, with some specific purpose in mind. I do not say that you should read all or most of the books in this list, below. It would be more than enough if you choose just one area that appeals to you most and read with passion just one book in that area, and try to live fully what you have read.

1. Patience: When the going gets tough, the tough get going. Sometimes waiting it out is the best way to handle a period of crisis. There is no healer and no problem-solver like time. Once you imbibe a spirit of patience, things will slowly start to fall into place. No pandemic or epidemic has lasted forever, and humans have eventually found ways to overcome all of them. There are three books I would suggest in order to develop patience. The first one is The Power of Patience (2018) by M. J. Ryan. Ryan gives some amazing insights into how one can slow down the rush of everyday life and really enjoy every moment by learning to be a bit more patient. The second book is Patience: The Art of Peaceful Living (2012) by Allan Lokos. The third book is Perfecting Patience: Buddhist Techniques to Overcome Anger (2018) by the Dalai Lama. The latter two books focus on Buddhist teachings aimed at teaching humans to overcome anger and annoyance.

2. Care, Safety, Responsibility: While some of us debate over the use of masks, while many of us crib about not being able to go out, let us remember that prevention is always better than cure. We owe it to ourselves and to those around us. The carelessness of one individual might ruin a hundred lives. We are fortunate to have health workers and security personnel to go out and wage the battle for us. Let us cooperate with them.

One remarkable book that powerfully conveys the need and the ways by which we can overcome the obstacles of life and take responsibility and ownership for our actions and shortcomings, our decisions and our destiny, is, Braving the Wilderness: The Quest for True Belonging and the Courage to Stand Alone (2017) by Brene Brown.

3. Positive Use of Time: Time is precious and the wise know how to use it well. In fact, the lockdown and work or study from home has freed up a lot of personal and family time. Use it for things we always wanted to do — catch up with family and friends virtually, read great books, watch amazing movies, learn music and dance, learn a new skill or craft or hobby, decorate your home, cook favourite dishes, take up teaching a subject or skill online… If you really think of it, the list is endless.

Create your own bucket list of things that you always wanted to do. 101 Things to Do before You Die (2008) by Richard Horne might give you some great ideas. Some of these ideas may be outlandish or absurd, but the aim here is not to follow the book literally, but to get the spirit of the book and create your own ‘to do’ list.

4. Return to Nature: This is a great time to re-establish the vital connect with nature. Take up gardening; look at the birds, flowers and trees; keep and care for a pet; meditate; breathe the early morning air; eat healthy; exercise vigorously; keep your mind and body engaged. Slowly, you will realise that these are the real luxuries of life! It would be worth enjoying the feast that literary classics have to offer us. Read the poems of Wordsworth, Keats and Shelley! Two essays you should not miss out are — Shooting an Elephant by George Orwell and Everything I Need to Know I Learned in The Forest by Vandana Shiva. But if you love fiction, then you will really enjoy Ruskin Bond’s The Big Book of Animal Stories (2015) and Jack London’s classic novel The Call of The Wild (1903) with a dog named Buck as its hero.

5. Creative and Positive Thinking: You may be depressed because of a break in your studies, a pay cut or a loss of job. Of course, it is hard! But it is not the end of the world. Think positive, be creative. Think of new avenues of employment, of self-employment, of new ideas. Remember, you will not lose until you lose hope.

A wonderful book I would strongly recommend is Build Your Dreams: How to Make a Living Doing What You Love (2013) by Alexis Irvin and Chip Hiden. Based on a real-life career workshop that inspired thousands of American college students, this book is a great guide for youngsters who are passionate about making a living out of their passions and interests.

6. Giving a Helping Hand: This is the time to re-awaken our long lost humane instincts. If you can, in whatever way you can, help those who are in a worse situation than you are — emotionally, materially, mentally, physically. This can range from monetary help to a phone call to help with essential supplies to online guidance to a positive text message. When you help your neighbour’s boat to reach the shore, you will find that you too would have reached the shore in no time. Reaching out to others is the best way to get over feelings of depression and self-pity. Often, our own struggles seem small when we look at the enormous challenges faced by others.

Perhaps there can be few things better than reading about one of the greatest givers of all times. Try to get hold of Navin Chawla’s Mother Teresa (2003).

7. Pray: A tree with strong roots can withstand even fierce storms. Spirituality, connecting with the divine, is a powerful way of establishing strong roots that can guide us safely through the ups and downs of life. Whichever religion you may belong to, you can always connect with the positive energy in the universe, with the strong belief that life and joy are much more powerful than death and disease. Let us hope, pray and believe that we shall come out of the Corona crisis safer, happier and wiser, sooner than later!

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